After University of Georgia running back Knowshon Moreno rushed for 188 yards and three touchdowns in victory over the University of Florida, sideline reporter Loran Smith kept saying. "Knowshon for Heisman! Knowshon for president!"
Smith said it so much, we had to give it some thought. Knowshon for Heisman? Maybe. For president? No way. We will let the sports gurus tell you why he is or is not a Heisman trophy candidate, but as for president, we will be glad to smack that idea down right now.
First and foremost, we already support
John Smoltz
for governor. For Moreno to leapfrog Smoltz after
just one game would be ridiculous. Besides that, to
qualify for president one must be at least
35-years-old. Moreno is only 20. In 15 years, he might
want to consider, but for now he just doesn't have the
background.
Plus, Moreno is from New Jersey, where he currently holds the state record for scoring. That might sound like a great credential, but think about it. Has anything good ever come out of Jersey? Let's see, there was Whitney Houston- she used to be good before all the crack. Then there is Martha Stewart- she is pure evil. And of course there is David Copperfield-who is having a bit of an image problem right now.
So far, Moreno isn't old enough and he doesn't have the heritage. What else could keep him from the Oval Office?
How about his name? Ever met a president named Knowshon? They are all named Thomas or Abraham or George. Maybe you remember George Washington. And, though you have tried to forget, our current president is George W. Bush. Let's face it, the name is a little to creative. Moreno's grandmother, Mildred McQueen, explained the name:
"When I was pregnant with his mother I picked up the name Varashon from a character in a short story I was reading at the time,'' McQueen said. ``When Varashon had Knowshon, she just took part of her name and added the `Know' for knowledge."
It's a descent story, but it's no "I chopped down a cherry tree" or "My father was president" story. Sorry Moreno, It is just not your time. So go ahead, win your little football games. Go to the NFL and collect millions of dollars for playing games. Collect endorsements as quick as you do groupies. You can do it all, Knowshon, but being President of the United States is not in your future!